So long, 2011

I'll remember it as the year I started blogging. I hope that memory turns out to be a good one.

Plan 'A' was to blog about guns mainly, maybe even some politics, but my Muse wandered off somewhere once I started typing. I don't mind so much, discovering that I'm a 'Blahgger' (blah, blah, blah) as opposed to a 'Blogger'. (and the political stuff raises my damn blood pressure to much, I'll leave that to someone else)

I was following the work of some pretty cool bloggers before I jumped into it myself. Now I've found out that there are a lot of them out there. People, and their views and experiences that I wouldn't know anything about if I hadn't started this walk. I'm glad to meet them, and sorry to see some go...(I'm talking about you, Breda)

I've also discovered that there's this whole etiquette thing in the blogging community that I know virtually nothing about. (Hint: If one of my fellow bloggers has a list of rules somewhere, send it along) Eventually I'll get it right, stepping on toes is nothing new to me.

The internet is a lot bigger and wider than I thought it was. I always knew there was plenty out there. (porn, music on YouTube, Hulu for old TV shows, gun forums, and, um...porn) Feels kind of like swimming in a nice calm river and finding out you've been swept out to sea.

JayG was right, it's better than sitting in my recliner and yelling at the TV.

I'm hooked.

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What were you doing ten years ago?

I had just returned from a deployment (that whole 9/11 thing) and was freezing my ass off in Norfolk, England. I was the only guy in East Dereham with a tan for New Year's.

If you send a picture, I'll put it up here on my blog.

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E P I G R A M S . LXV. — TO MY MUSE. Away, and leave me, thou thing most abhorr'd That hast betray'd me to a worthless lord ; Made me commit most fierce idolatry To a great image through thy luxury : Be thy next master's more unlucky muse, And, as thou'st mine, his hours and youth abuse, Get him the time's long grudge, the court's ill will ; And reconcil'd, keep him suspected still. Make him lose all his friends ; and, which is worse, Almost all ways to any better course. With me thou leav'st an happier muse than thee, And which thou brought'st me, welcome poverty : She shall instruct my after-thoughts to write Things manly, and not smelling parasite. But I repent me : stay — Whoe'er is raised, For worth he has not, he is tax'd not praised.
Source: Jonson, Ben. The Works of Ben Jonson. Boston: Phillips, Sampson, and Co., 1853. 790.

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Y'all have a fun New Year's celebration.

Mrs. B and I are going to have a small bonfire in the backyard and drink booze.

(Crap. That reminds me, I need to run up to Quantico and buy some.)

See you next year!

What. The. Fuck.

Alternative Title: An Open Letter to the Chairman of the Republican Party of Virginia

Dear Pat Mullins,

Please tell me you didn't kow about this.
Please tell me you fell asleep for a moment, and some scoundrel slipped this in while you were dozing.

I'll buy that...I swear.
For the love of God, just tell me you didn't approve of the idea that voters in the Republican primary in this great state would have to sign an Oath of Loyalty.

Exactly what the fuck were you thinking?
That was a rhetorical question. Don't waste your breath answering it. You obviously weren't thinking at all.

I have voted for the Republican ticket regularly for the last 20 years, and this is the first time I have had any serious misgivings about my choices. This is your party, Pat. Did you somehow miss that a majority of the members of your party were in favor of smaller government? Would it be possible to explain how that fact ties in with your monarchesque fealty oath? (Yeah, I made that word up. I like it....Welcome to America, asshole.)

I am registered as an Independent. Do you know what that means?
That means when I walk into the voting booth, I vote for whoever the fuck I want to vote for. I somehow got the impression that's what this country is all about.

When I was a boy in grade school, I pledged allegiance to the flag.
When I became a man, I swore an oath to support and defend the Constitution of the United States.
Now you want me to swear on oath of loyalty to you and your gang of pusillanimous shitflaps just so I can be allowed to vote in my own state's primary elections? (Papieren bitte?)

My blood pressure is high enough already, so I'm not even going to start on the fact that you somehow condoned the barring of candidates from this year's elections in Virginia. Aren't you supposed to be helping the Republican party in this state? Really? My only choices in this primary are going to be Mitt "Flip Flop" Romney and Ron "Crazier than a Shithouse Rat" Paul?

You have sorely tempted me to simply vote our incumbent asswipe back into office for another four years.
I can sit back and twiddle my thumbs while that commie bastard runs our great country into the ground.
Make no mistake, I would do it just to spite you, asshole.

Cracker

Mrs B and I got all three seasons of the BBC show Cracker on video for Christmas.

I'd forgotten how much I liked British television. The distinct lack of high-dollar boob jobs is a refreshing change from the average Hollywood stuff.

Good music

Went to Dad's house for Christmas dinner.
The drive back took about an hour, and was a perfect opportunity to listen to the CD Dad gave me.
It was a Greatest Hits collection from The Band. (Another one of those bands I used to listen to on 8-tracks in my Dad's VW Bus.)



Man, that brought back some memories. We cruised on down the road listening to The Weight, Stagefright, The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down, Up On Cripple Creek, all my old favorites...Mrs. B didn't complain one bit, although I know it's not really her style of music.

Fast forward to Monday night. Mrs. B and I sit down to play some cards. A nice quiet relaxing time before I go to bed early and get up for work the next day.

Mrs. B "We're going to listen to my music tonight. I listened to The Band all the way home from your Dad's house last night, so you behave."

MSgt B "Of course, Honey. You're so good to me. I'm going to show my appreciation for you by spending some quality time listening to music you like, and enjoying this sharing/caring moment we have together." (This is exactly what I was thinking. You know, Christmas spirit and all that. What came out was probably more along the lines of "Mmm hmm." but it was all good intentions.)

So she powers up the AM/FM radio on the windowsill, and tunes in this...



Mrs. B "Awesome! Isn't this a great song? I mean, really....what makes The Band so much better than this?"

So I told her....


Fuck My Life

I really need to work on my 'When and how to lie to your wife' skills

Shit my Boss Says

Core competency – Stay in your own lane, asshole

I like what you're saying - but what you're doing is a complete balls-up

Growth involves expanding - Your workday just went to 14 hours

You're the backbone - You're taking the blame if this shit goes wrong

You've got great bandwidth - You're not focusing

Best practice - I'm stealing that idea

Bring your own Advil - It's time for your ass-chewing

You're boiling the ocean - Work smarter, not harder

We'll handle that offline - I can't believe you said something that stupid. Come by my office later. Bring your own Advil.

Add it to my punchlist - I'll get to it right after never

Leveraging resources – You're working through the holiday

Value-added – What have you done for me lately?

Catalyst for change – I'm gonna make you fire that guy

Shifting paradigms – I've got a great idea that involves you traveling for six months (See also:  Flexibility)

Flexibility - I'm about to ask you to do some shit you never dreamed you'd be trying at this job

I'm going to let you Opt-in on this - It just got assigned to you, now smile about it.

He left to pursue outside opportunities - I fired his ass.

I'll be over-your-shoulder on this - I'll be watching, so don't screw this up.

Are you eating my lunch? - Actually, yes, I was eating his lunch. We had a bunch of exec types on site that day, and someone had ordered in bag lunches from a local deli. I grabbed the one I thought was mine and started nomming down freestyle in the control room. When he appeared over my shoulder and asked me that, I thought it was another one of his euphemisms for something stupid I said in front of the big boys. Eventually we worked it out and got a good laugh out of it. My boss is actually a really cool guy.

12 Step Program for Retirees

I found this sitting in my "Blog Fodder" folder, and for the life of me, I can't remember who I stole it from.
Anyway, I thought it was funny as hell, so I'm posting it.

 

1. I am retired from the military. I have a problem. This is the first step to recovery...

2. Speech:

• Time should never begin with a zero or end in a hundred, it is not 0530 or 1400 it is 5:30 in the morning (AKA God-awful early).
• Words like deck, rack, and "PT" will get you weird looks; floor, bed, workout...get used to it.
• "F *ck" cannot be used to replace whatever word you can't think of right now, try "um".
• Grunting is not talking.
• It's a phone, not a radio, conversations on a phone do not end in "out" or "roger"
• People will not know what you are talking about if you tell them you are coming from Camp Lejeune with the MWSS platoon or that you spent a deployment in the OCAC

3. Style:

• Do not put creases in your jeans.
• Do not put creases on the front of your dress shirts.
• A horseshoe cut looks dumb, not motivating.
• A high and tight looks really dumb as well.
• So does a low reg, but not as bad.
• A hat indoors does not make you a bad person, it makes you like the rest of the world.
• You do not have to wear a belt ALL the time.

4. Women:

• Air Force girls are easy, very easy, not all women are this easy and will probably punch you in the nuts if you treat them like Air Force girls.
• Being divorced twice by the time you are 23 is not normal, neither are 6 month marriages, even if it is your first.
• Marrying a girl so that you can move out of the barracks does not make "financial sense", it makes you a retard.

5. Personal accomplishments:

• In the real world, being able to do pushups will not make you good at your job.
• Most people will be slightly disturbed if you tell them about people you have killed or seen die.
• How much pain you can take is not a personal accomplishment.
• The time you got really drunk and passed the sobriety test anyway is also not a personal accomplishment.

6. Drinking:

• In the real world, being drunk before 5pm will get you an intervention, not a "good for you"
• That time you drank a 5th of Jaeger and pissed in your closet is not a conversation starter.
• That time you went to the combat life saver school and practiced giving vodka IV's will also not be a good conversation starter

7. Bodily functions:

• Farting on your co-workers and then giggling while you run away may be viewed as "unprofessional".
• The size of the dump you took yesterday will not be funny no matter how big it was, how much it burned, or how much it smelled.
• You can't make fun of someone for being sick, no matter how funny it is
• VD will also not be funny
• Most people will not want to hear about your balls. Odd as that may seem, it's true.

8. Spending habits:

• One day, you will have to pay bills
• Civilians pay taxes. Now that you are no longer a G.I., you pay taxes too. Get used to it. There's no such thing as "Tax-free allowances" anymore.
• Spending money on video games instead of on diapers makes you a fool.
• One day you will need health insurance. Tri-care sucks.

9. Interacting with civilians (AKA YOU):

• Making fun of your neighbor to his face for being fat will not be normal.

10. Real jobs:

• They really can fire you.
• On the flip side you really can quit.
• Screaming at the people that work for you will not be normal, remember they really can quit too.
• Taking naps at work will not be acceptable.
• Remember 9 to 5, not 0530 to 1800

11. The Law:

• Non-judicial punishment does not exist and will not save you from prison.
• Your workplace unlike your command can't save you and probably won't, in fact most likely you will fired about 5 minutes after they find out you've been arrested
• Even McDonalds does background checks
• Fighting is not a normal thing and will get you really arrested, not yelled at Monday morning before they ask you if you won.

12. General knowledge:

• You can in fact really say what you think about the President in public.
• Pain is not weakness leaving the body, it's just pain.
• They won't wear anything shiny that tells you they are more important than you are, be polite.
• Read the contracts before you sign them, remember what happened the first time.

Christmas Day Post

I'd write something meaningful, but really?



Teh Kewtness!   It buuuurns!!!

Hope you have a good time today. Maybe see some family, eat some grub, shit like that.

Your Christmas Funny for 2011.

Ruger Blackhawk (Gun Pr0n)

This is the Ruger Blackhawk with the Bisley grip.

This is the one that gives you "Ruger knuckle".

As you can see from my post on the Ruger SP101, the Hogue overgrip that I bought for that one prevents "Ruger knuckle" because it fills in the gap behind the trigger guard. No such luck on the Blackhawk. You hit her and she hits back.

That's not to mean she doesn't shoot like a laser. She brings me much joy at the range, as long as I stop at about 30-40 rounds. Beyond that, and my saluting finger might start to swell from the abuse.

This is a single-action six-shooter chambered in .45 Long Colt. Or, as we say in my house, "a fucking Scud missile".

It's my barbeque gun.  I only wear it to special events, and I only open carry it.

There are many like her, but this one is mine.
Her name is 'Jo'. (Josephine)

Naval (not navel) Logistics

On 23 August 1779, the USS Constitution set sail from Boston, loaded with 475 officers and men, 48,600 gallons of water, 74,000 cannon shot, 115,000 pounds of black powder and 79,000 gallons of rum.


Her mission: to destroy and harass English Shipping On 6 October, she made Jamaica, took on 826 pounds of flour and 688,300 gallons of rum. Three weeks later, Constitution reached the Azores, where she provisioned with 550 pounds of beef and 300 gallons of Portuguese wine.

On 18 November, she set sail for England where her crew captured and scuttled 12 English merchant vessels and took aboard rum.

By this time, Constitution had run out of shot. Nevertheless, she made her way unarmed up the Firth of Clyde for a night raid. Here, her landing party captured a whiskey distillery, transferred 13,000 gallons aboard and headed for home.

On 20 February 1780, the Constitution arrived in Boston with no cannon shot, no food, no powder, no rum, and no whiskey.

She did, however, still carry her crew of 475 officers and men and 18,600 gallons of water. The math is quite enlightening:
Length of cruise: 181 days
Booze consumption: 1.26 gallons per man per day (this does not include the unknown quantity of rum captured from the 12 English merchant vessels in November).

Naval historians note that the reenlistment rate from this cruise was 92%.

Go Here for more good military humor

Take a trip down to Loosanna

Wanna give a shout out to some the guys who got me started on this blogging nightmare.



Until I get my work out of the way, go check out Mostly Cajun and PawPaw. Couple of good ol' Cajun boys.

Still busting my ass trying to make sure I get some time off for Christmas.

ETA: Roberta wins the 'Awesome Post of the Month' award. Go girl!

Mercy is the mark of a great man

Work caught up with me.
We've got some serious fouling on our microfiltration units. The river may have undergone a thermal inversion. It's a bit late in the year for that sort of thing, but it's been a very warm fall around here.

I've got my work cut out for me if I want to have some time off for Christmas.

Interesting times

We are anonymous

We ask that you post the following in public places

Whereas, on the 14th of December, 2011, the House of Representatives of these United States voted in favor of indefinite military detention, without charges, of any American, anywhere, anytime, without due process of law, at the discretion of the government alone;
Whereas, on the 15th of December, 2011, the Senate of these United States voted in favor of the same bill;
Whereas, the proscription against the use of military force to police the populous has been an essential feature of American civic life and civic liberty since the arrival of our civilization upon this continent;
Whereas, the wanton violation of this proscription was one of the chief causes of the separation of the American peoples from their government in Great Britain;
Whereas, the Constitution so chartering the government of these United States does not grant this power;
Whereas, the Constitution forbids the addition of any power not enumerated to the general government;
Whereas, the use of such draconian measures has been an essential feature of the enforcement of tyranny by totalitarian governments of the 20th century, including, but not limited to, the Nationalist-Socialist government of Germany, the fascist government of Italy, the government of the United Soviet Socialist Republics, and the government of Vietnam;
Whereas, the use of such draconian measures is carefully calculated to quash all political dissent amongst a captive people;
Whereas, the codification of such draconian measures effectively nullifies all civil liberties the people may hope to hold;
Whereas, the codification of such draconian measures are the last act in the quest to hold a people captive to the rapacious will of their government without recourse;
And whereas, the codification of such draconian measures is an act of war against the populous at large;
Therefore, be it declared that a STATE OF WAR formally exists between the Government of these United States and the People of these United States.
We, the People of these United States, declare any and all attempts to enforce the provisions of HR 1540 to be unlawful, void, and of no force.
We, declare ALL WHO voted in favor of HR 1540, and ALL WHO attempt to enforce HR 1540 to be traitors to these United States, punishable under law.
We, SHALL DISOBEY, APPREHEND, OR RESIST WITH DEADLY FORCE, in our discretion, any person who attempts to enforce the provisions of HR 1540.
We, SHALL NOT aggress against any employee of any American government who shall not attempt to enforce or aid and abet the enforcement of HR 1540, they being as trapped as the rest of the populous.
Such STATE OF WAR shall continue until HR 1540 is stricken from the code of law, and all who had hand in HR 1540 are brought to justice under due process of law.
Signed and witnessed by we, the individual citizens of these United States, below:



That's some scary shit right there.

When MTV is playing commercials like those, you can rest assured the kids are receiving a whole new message about 'Hope and Change' than they were getting a few years back.

And those 'Anonymous' people from 4chan are getting in on the act now. They've received some media attention in the past when they've threatened cyber attacks. Something like this statement of war shows up all over the internets and nary a peep from the MSM? Are the networks afraid that, if they report on this stuff, someone will come and throw them in a camp somewhere? (Of course, when the name of your organization is "Anonymous", just about any d-bag can post crap all over the internet and put your name on it...)

When is someone going to go on the air and start blaming the Democrats/Republicans/the "do-nothing Congress"/the President/ etc. etc..

After 20 years in the Air Force, I was really looking forward to a nice quiet retirement. FML.

Mondays

That was a long weekend. Mrs. B and I were invited to a Christmas party off over the horizon a bit.

Drove an hour to a hotel room over in Maryland, then the last thirty minutes with a Nepalese cab driver who learned about driving in America by watching rally videos over at Peter's blog.

We thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. I drank too much and danced like I knew what I was doing, Mrs. B talked non-stop for 6-7 hours, even when we were on the dance floor.

Made it back to the hotel in one piece. I had a much greater appreciation for our cab driver's skills after a few extra rounds of Jack and Miller light, and we chatted pleasantly about Hinduism and life back in Nepal while he showed everyone else on the road how driving is really done.

After a generous donation towards getting our driver's family over here from Nepal, we relaxed at our hotel with a nightcap (or two) and eventually drifted off sometime early Sunday morning.

By the time we made it back to the house Sunday, I thought it would be a good idea to cop a few Z's before the Skins game and ended up sleeping though more than half. I woke up in the third quarter to find we were actually winning one. WTF?...Ah yes, our offense is mostly second-stringers vying for a starting slot next season. Good showing, boys.

Now this morning's big news is the passing of The Dear Leader. North Korea can now look forward to more peace and prosperity under the sage guidance of Junior.

Wonderful.

Also found out Vaclav Havel passed away. I read a book comprised of his essays and letters to his wife during his time as a political prisoner. Did you know his favorite album was Pink Floyd's The Wall?...Cool guy.

I'll work on some real blogging tonight.

Nobody says 'giving' at Christmas like Tom Waits

Not everyone is spending Christmas hugging their kids and sipping cognac by the fireplace.

'Tis the Season, where I try to go out and do a few good things. It's not like I'm some recluse millionaire handing out money to strangers, but I can afford a couple bucks here and there. (Evil looms! Comboy up, kill it, get paid!)

Seems people are going around anonymously paying off K-Mart layaways of toys and clothes. That's cool. I wish I had thought of something like that a little earlier in the season, when I still had $100 to spare.

Times are hard, but don't let them get so hard that you can't at least drop five or ten bucks on those Damn Jarheads.



The man's an artist.

This ain't Hell, but....

You can always find a bunch of very opinionated vets over in the comments section at This Ain't Hell, but you can see it from here..

Vets4Obama
The money quote:
"you can’t tell the military that Obama is a strong and capable leader when they’ve been surrounded by strong and capable leaders for their whole adult lives and know what one really looks like"

In a hurry?
The money quote:
"the first rule of international fight club should be, “burn all the shit before you leave.”"



December 15, 1944 -
The airplane carrying Glenn Miller disappears over the English Channel.

Mooog's Holiday Letter

Time to get the spirit of Christmas rolling.

Mooog posted his Mooog Family Holiday Letter.

You should also go read last year's.

Drop by and say Hi, he's a pretty funny guy.*


*Dude, I just made a jingle. Mooog would be proud.

Old Dogs don't last forever

There's nothing like a good pair of boots.

Back when I first joined our Armed Forces, (when men were men, and sheep were nervous) our boots were made by prisoners enjoying the hospitality of our Federal penal system.
They were seriously heavy-duty stuff. Even with the careless abuse I handed out to my footwear in those days, a pair of those prison boots would last at least a year. If you took even modest care of them, you could get almost two years out of them, but such durability came at a cost.

Breaking in a new pair of boots could be a painful process. Those babies were made of leather. Not suede or lambskin, but serious fucking cowhide, like the stuff Evyl Robot makes his holsters from.
Anyone who went through basic training back in the '80's or earlier can tell you about the experience they had with that first pair of boots. Moleskin and Band-aids, blisters and bloody socks, some of those tales will turn your stomach, but like any good yarn of hardship and triumph, every one of those troops will tell you that the boots they wore leaving basic fit like a favorite pair of old slippers.

As time wore on, our boots became more modern. No longer were they provided by the dedicated workmanship of convicted felons and the like. Our boots now had brand-names:  Bates and Corcoran, Belleville and Magnum, and many more. They were canvas-sided and composite-toed, light-weight and polish-free, and best of all, they were stylish. You could have the feel of your favorite old slipper right out of the box. No more suffering through the horrible break-in of those tough old slab leather nightmares.
This also came at a cost. Throughout my later years in the Air Force, I could carefully pamper my boots and make them last a whole year. Anyone who did any real work in those things would burn through them in 6-9 months. Many of the troops who worked for me did just that.

Now that I have moved on to find my fortune in the civilian world, I have run into a very similar problem. My generous employer provides boots for the workplace. We simply have to go pick out the pair we want, and we are provided an adequate stipend. One that would obtain for us a perfectly serviceable pair of work boots that met all requirements for our job.

I was ecstatic! Now I would truly have a chance to live the good life. Surely the boots worn in the "real world" had to be light-years ahead of the crap I had put on my feet for the last twenty years. I went for the uber-comfortable, monster-toe low-rider. The ultimate in comfort and class.

 NOT!
Those things folded like a Hallmark card. I wore through that sole like nobody's business. "Water resistant"my ass. I couldn't put enough waterproofing on those things. By the time I tossed them, that was just about all that was holding them together.

This is America, boy. You get what you pay for. I'm not talking about money payment. I'm talking about a pair of boots that wants to take something from you before they give something back. I'm talking about a pair of boots that you will have a relationship with for many years to come.

Any pair of boots that's ever going to be worth anything, is going to be worth the time it takes to break them in.

You ever do any real work in your favorite old slippers? How long do you think they would last?

Got my new boots!

P.S. - I've heard Evyl Robot's holsters break-in very nicely too. When the time comes, I'm buying from him.

Busy Busy Busy...

Bonus if you can name the book referenced by the title.

No blog - just "filler"




P.S. - How does someone Google "torpedo barbeque grill" and get hits on my site?

Ruger SP101

Or:  "A completely biased gun review by someone with almost zero qualifications"

As you all will be able to see from the pics, this is a regular carry piece of my collection. (i.e. it's dirty)

This is a Ruger SP101, .357 caliber, snub-nosed, double-action-only, 5-shot revolver.

I think it is considered by most people to be a BUG, but I tend to disagree. Being stainless steel, the pistols weighs quite a bit. CON: I tried wearing it an ankle holster and ended up dragging a leg around like Igor by the end of the day. PRO: Being a stainless steel revolver means I only have to clean it about once a year. (As you can see)

The day I brought her home from the nursery, we went straight to the range and put about 100 rounds through her. It was then that I fell in love. Unfortunately, I bought her with the original stock grips...

Ouch, ouch, and OUCH! After just 100 rounds, I awoke the next morning with a significant bruise on my palm, and a couple respectable blisters near the base of my thumb. (It was from shooting, I swear...)

I quickly ran back to the nursery and picked up a Hogue soft rubber grip for her.

So, of course, we had to go back to the range and see how she handled.

Much better.....A while back, I sent a copy of this video over to Wirecutter when he was extolling the virtues of the .357 caliber. Of course, the first person to comment razzed me about my grip change-up every time I pulled the trigger. (It was from shooting, I swear...)

CON: It's a tough pistol to find a retention holster for. I carry it in a regular leather pancake, so I tend to only carry it when I'm completely concealed. PRO: It does well inside the waistband, and I can sweat all over that stainless steel finish without any worries.

CON: It only carries five shots. I don't care what anyone says about a "speed-loader" I just can't reload it as fast as I can one of my semi-autos. PRO: It weighs a metric shit-ton, and makes a great club when you run out of ammo.

CON: It's double-action only, and I suffer from "happy hands" when shooting DAO. I'm good on a six inch target out to only about 10-12 feet. After that, it's center-of-mass only, and my aim gets exponentially worse very quickly in relation to distance. PRO: It's an old school wheel gun. It's not going to fail to extract, it's not going to stovepipe, it's not going to fail to feed. The only time this pistol has failed at trigger time is when I forget to load it.

PRO: She barks. She barks LOUD. This gun is just plain fun to shoot! At an indoor range, all other shooting stops and heads turn to see what the hell made that noise. Everyone wants to come over and try a couple rounds. For an attention-whore like me, that's a great day at the range. I can tone it down to .38 special when I want to do some drills, which saves money and wear and tear on the pistol.

One of my favorite drills is to have a friend randomly mix .38 and .357 in the chambers before I shoot. It tells you a lot about how much you're anticipating recoil.

There are many like her, but this one is mine.

Her name is "Betty".

While you wait...

for me to come up with something interesting to write.

Go around and see the lovely Jennifer, and some other guy singing.

Excellent performance!

No Bleg

Travelling.
Excellent company Christmas party last night. Now we're going to hang around Richmond for a few hours and do some Christmas shopping.

Movie Meme

My first Blogger meme! (Because all the cool kids are doing it...)

The 100 top "Cult classics" How many have you seen?

2001: A Space Odyssey, Stanley Kubrick, 1968 (+ 2010, which was better)
Akira, Katsuhiro Otomo, 1988
Angel of Vengeance, Abel Ferrara, 1981
Bad Taste, Peter Jackson, 1987
Baise-moi, Virginie Despentes, Coralie Trinh Thi, 2000
Begotten, E. Elias Merhige, 1991
Behind the Green Door, Artie Mitchell, Jim Mitchell, 1972
La belle et la bête, Jean Cocteau, 1946
Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, Russ Meyer, 1970
The Big Lebowski, Joel Coen, Ethan Coen, 1998 (Meh)
Blade Runner, Ridley Scott, 1982 (Awesome!)
Blue Sunshine, Jeff Lieberman, 1978
Brazil, Terry Gilliam, 1985
Bride of Frankenstein, James Whale, 1935 (Classic zombie)
The Brood, David Cronenberg, 1979
Das Cabinet des Dr. Caligari, Robert Wiene, 1920
Café Flesh, Stephen Sayadian, 1982
Cannibal Holocaust, Ruggero Deodato, 1979
Casablanca, Michael Curtiz, 1942 (The original badass, before there was Clint)
Un chien andalou, Luis Buñuel, Salvador Dalí,1928
Coffy, Jack Hill, 1973
Daughters of Darkness, Harry Kümel, 1971
Dawn of the Dead, George A. Romero, 1978 (Zombies are awesome!)
Deadly Weapons, Doris Wishman, 1974
Debbie Does Dallas, Jim Clark, 1978 (Rule 5)
Deep Red, Dario Argento, 1975
Dirty Dancing, Emile Ardolino, 1987 (Mrs B's favorite)
Django, Sergio Corbucci, 1966
Donnie Darko, Richard Kelly, 2001 (Creepy)
Don't Torture a Duckling, Lucio Fulci, 1972
Edward Scissorhands, Tim Burton, 1990 (Funnier than I expected)
Emanuelle and the Last Cannibals, Aristide Massaccesi, 1977
Emmanuelle, Just Jaeckin, 1974
Enter the Dragon, Robert Clouse, 1973 (Every Kung-fu movie since is measured by this one)
Eraserhead, David Lynch, 1977
The Evil Dead, Sam Raimi, 1981 (Meh)
Fight Club, David Fincher, 1999 (Awesome!)
Flaming Creatures, Jack Smith, 1963
Freak Orlando, Ulrike Ottinger, 1981
Freaks, Tod Browning, 1932
Ginger Snaps, John Fawcett, 2000
The Gods Must Be Crazy, Jamie Uys, 1981
Godzilla, Ishirô Honda, 1954 (You always remember your first)
The Harder They Come, Perry Henzell, 1972
Harold and Maude, Hal Ashby, 1971
Häxan, Benjamin Christensen, 1922
Hellraiser, Clive Barker, 1987 (Love his books)
The Holy Mountain, Alejandro Jodorowsky, 1973
The House with the Laughing Windows, Pupi Avati, 1976
I Walked with a Zombie, Jacques Tourneur, 1943
Ichi the Killer, Takashi Miike, 2001
In Bruges, Martin McDonagh, 2008 (Cheesy)
Invasion of the Body Snatchers, Don Siegel, 1956 (Good remakes too)
Invocation of My Demon Brother, Kenneth Anger, 1969
It's a Wonderful Life, Frank Capra, 1946 (Every Christmas)
The Killer, John Woo, 1989
Lady Terminator, H. Tjut Djalil, 1988
The Lord of the Rings, Peter Jackson, 2001–3 (The book was better)
Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior, George Miller, 1981
Man Bites Dog, Rémy Belvaux, André Bonzel, Benoît Poelvoorde, 1992
Manos, the Hands of Fate, Harold P. Warren, 1966
The Masque of the Red Death, Roger Corman, 1964
Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Terry Gilliam, Terry Jones, 1975
Near Dark, Kathryn Bigelow, 1987
Nekromantik, Jörg Buttgereit, 1987
Night of the Living Dead, George A. Romero, 1968 (Zombies are awesome! Part II)
Pink Flamingos, John Waters, 1972
Piranha, Joe Dante, 1978
Plan 9 from Outer Space, Ed Wood, Jr, 1959
Re-Animator, Stuart Gordon, 1985
Reefer Madness, Louis Gasnier, 1936
Repo Man, Alex Cox, 1984
Ringu, Hideo Nakata, 1998 (Jap version of The Ring)
The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Jim Sharman, 1975 (Best in the theatre)

Rome Armed to the Teeth, Umberto Lenzi, 1976
The Room, Tommy Wiseau, 2003
Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom, Pier Paolo Pasolini, 1975
She Killed in Ecstasy, Jesús Franco, 1971
Showgirls, Paul Verhoeven, 1995 (Bewbies!)
Soul Vengeance, Jamaa Fanaka, 1975
The Sound of Music, Robert Wise, 1965 (Julie Andrews is Hawt!)
Star Wars, George Lucas, 1977–2005 (Awesome!)
Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story, Todd Haynes, 1988
Suspiria, Dario Argento, 1977
Tank Girl, Rachel Talalay, 1995 (Actually good, tongue-in-cheek humor)
Tetsuo, Shinya Tsukamoto, 1989
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Tobe Hooper, 1974 (Would be better with zombies)
This Is Spınal Tap, Rob Reiner, 1984
Thriller: A Cruel Picture, Bo Arne Vibenius, 1974
Thundercrack!, Curt McDowell, 1975
El Topo, Alejandro Jodorowsky, 1970
The Toxic Avenger, Michael Herz, Lloyd Kaufman, 1984
Two-Lane Blacktop, Monte Hellman, 1971
Two Thousand Maniacs!, Herschell Gordon Lewis, 1964
The Vanishing, George Sluizer, 1988
Videodrome, David Cronenberg, 1983
The Warriors, Walter Hill, 1979 (Awesome!)
Witchfinder General, Michael Reeves, 1968
Withnail & I, Bruce Robinson, 1987
The Wizard of Oz, Victor Fleming, 1939 (+ the Pink Floyd version)

37 out of 100, and I thought I was a movie buff.

Everyone should note that there are two, count them TWO, George Romero zombie movies on this list. Zombies are awesome!

Debbie does Dallas. Really? That's supposed to be a cult classic? Dude, when I watched it, it was called Porn. Maybe I'm just showing my age.

Where are all the westerns? The Good, The Bad and The Ugly; A Fistful of Dollars; The Magnificent Seven; Rooster Cogburn...

Hello! McFly? How can you have a cult movie list without Dr. Strangelove? Not to mention any Quentin Tarantino movies...

I'm afraid the whole list falls a little short. Where did this get started?

Bad Moon Risin'

It's a full-moon weekend!

Let's hear from TOTWTYTR, Ambulance Driver, Traumaqueen, Insomniac Medic, Lawdog, Capt Tightpants, Paw Paw, Brigid and any other coppers and EMS types.
Does the full moon really bring out the weirdos?

Busted

Crap. They found my Mothership.

Manifest Destiny

MANIFEST DESTINY IS (was) AWESOME

I just had to let my American-Imperialist-Warmonger-Evil Capitalist flag fly!

It used to be okay to think we deserved more than what we have now. When did that change?